Do I have alzheimers?

 This is a question I’ve been asking myself for a couple of weeks now.  Sure I am forgetting the names of things but eventually I get it right, however, this past weekend I bought two donuts.  Nothing major in that.  I put them away and went out again.  When I came home I asked my daughter if she enjoyed one of the donuts.  She looked at me strangely and told me she hadn’t eaten it.  She’s on a health kick so I obviously believed her, however, that meant the only other person to eat it was myself and for the life of me I don’t remember eating it.

This is the first time something major like this has happened to me and I’m afraid I’m going mad or losing my mind.

My mother died within in the last year with dementia and I’m starting to see similarities between us which is funny considering I have been told all my life that I’m more like my father.

My only saving grace is that my mother retired and basically shut down because she didn’t have any hobbies of any kind and didn’t really want to do anything.  Me on the other hand, love being alone and can always find things to do and rarely sit still staring at the walls.  This does not mean I’ll be like her and maybe it’s just age that’s hitting me.  I’m 64 but don’t look or feel like it.  I have a full time job and plan on continuing for as long as I can.

This page is just for me and what I am thinking and feeling at this time.  Hopefully it’s a very slow progression but more importantly I do NOT want to lose myself and definitely don’t want to be a burden on my family.  That would be the worst thing to happen to me.

So UNIVERSE?  Fuck off and leave me alone to enjoy the rest of my life without the worry of losing myself.